On being a mum!

Several thoughts were racing through my mind when I first discovered that I was pregnant. Yes, like any lady I was full of all kind of emotions when I first got to know about it. Couldn't believe, couldn't cry or jump in joy but tears rolled down on my cheeks and suddenly I had a feeling which I could not be explained. Something inside me changed. I started making plans of what, how, when and so on...

Funny things as part of this journey..was my sense of smell increased to the extent that i could clearly pick out someone who was not wearing any sort of colonge or deo. Yuck!

Jokes apart i will not bog down anybody with my symptoms because will share those in another write-up. There were sevreral other female employees who were already a mom. Looking at so many working moms i too decided to join back work post 6 months after delivery. But fate had different plans for me. My baby grew so fond of me infact we both grew so fond of eachother that I chose to become a stay at home mommy. Not that i am taking away the credits of any working mom; but a 24×7 momma has got no leaves in her kitty unlike a working person.

But tell you what it would have been a lot easier if I had formula fed my baby and hired a maid. Doing all the chores and nursing my tot left me famished and irritated. I had hardly any time for myself. Stealing time away from my baby to have a cuppa coffee was a distant dream, let alone shopping and movies and dining out were only taking place in my dreams. To top it all I had put on weight which refused to leave me...lolzz. Thanks to one of the lady doctors who had suggested no....actually forced me to take protein supplements. There! i had to deal with physical stress and still fathom the fact that i had t quit my  job owing to motherhood. After all babies grow up with the blink of an eye and moreover, i didn't want to miss out on any of her milestones.

Now after all these hullabaloo and tending to my tot's need day in and day out i still enjoy being a mum. I now have a constant companion who snuggles and showers her love on me. Yes my little one who is now a toddler is now fun to be with. I feel elated at how she imitates me, tries to spill out mamma, baba, quickly picks up things that i teach her each day and the way she dances to Bollywood songs makes me skip a beat. The joy that feel in watching her grow is beyond comprehension. I only have one thing to remind myself each day when i miss being a working person- the moments spent with my baby will never come back. However, i can start off work, rejoin the babdwagon of corporate employees after a break when my tot is a little more independent.

I am still a new mommy, learning the nuances of being a mum. I wish good luck to all the seasoned moms and the moms in the making to bestow them with patience to cope with the challenges of momhood.

Abosheshey- At last

The story starts with Soumya (Ankur Khanna) who has come down to Kolkata to settle some legal formalities of an apartment which his mother has left behind. As the story moves forward and Soumya gets to know her mother through her letters and later on through various people in her life, he gets caught up in her memories. He comes to know his mother through others, through her memories, her paintings, and her songs.

Initially, I thought Partho (Suchismita’s husband) deserted Suchismita for another woman. Partho also kept Suchismita bereft of her son’s love and affection by taking him along with him abroad. But as the story unfolds, I got to know that it was Suchi’s decision to stay back in India, in Kolkata. It was her choice, nobody forced her. Her husband gave her a year to think over and then join him, but she chose not to. So where is the sympathy coming from, I fail to understand. It was all her choice to stay back, to stay rooted in her city, in her country, close to her friends, her familial house, her guide (her painting teacher) and her comfort zone. So why is everyone in the movie brooding over her death and her fate of not getting a chance to meet her son before she left for the heavenly aboard? She has led her life as per her terms and conditions and mark my words, in the movie it was clearly said, though she was lonely, she was not unhappy. So, I can see a selfish lady craving for her own independence and joy she chose to forsake her son, her only son. She chose to part with her son. May be she did write letters to her son, but her son didn’t receive them. Whatever the case may be, I don’t feel pity for the character Suchi, because she is to be blamed for her state today. Suchi was portrayed as a self-contained and fiercely independent woman.

Also, in the last ten minutes of the movie it was revealed that Partho had a love child named Meghla somewhere in Sikkim whom Suchi met for the for the first and last time before her death. This answers our question why she went to Seven Hills. But what difference does this make? Partho went to States anyway. Is this shown to emphasize on the point that Partho too was selfish, that he kept his needs at the top ignoring what others wanted? Not sure if this is what the movie has intended to portray. But this is my take on the movie Abhosheshey.

The USP of the movie is its presentation with superb dialogues and the Rabindra sangeet that Suchi (Rupa Ganguly) has sung. Though I am no Rabindra sangeet fan, I somehow enjoyed the songs in this movie. It just added to the sad melancholy mood of the movie. Also, I feel that movie could have been a little condensed before the interval. All in all, this is a one time watchable movie.

Lessons Learnt

Life teaches us many things which books don't. Here are certain things I have learned, which I plan to share.

• First of all, every problem has a solution.
• You need to think about the solution of a problem keeping yourself independent of it. This way you come up with solutions easily.
  
• All things you wish for come to you only when they are destined to. Yes, I believe in destiny and divine intervention. So, no matter how hard you try to get to your goals, you will achieve them only when the right time comes.
  
• Remember, when you have a row with a person, think about the good things and good qualities of that person. I am sure, good qualities will always outnumber the bad ones if you try. Doing so will lessen your anger quickly.

Ringtones

Why do we choose to play a particular ringtone? Is it because of the following reasons?

We like it and we drown are thoughts in the b’ful music.

To show off that I have the latest ringtone in my cell.

To attract attention, at least this is how I will get noticed!

To show what’s playing on my mind.

To wake people in and nearby cubicles as they are fast asleep.


What ever may be your reason, it's quite irritating when you are on a con call and the person next to you is away and his/her cell phone is buzzing away. Phew!

You Know You're Growing Old When...

You know you are growing old when one or more of the following is true. See for yourselves :D

You keep talking to yourself while working or otherwise.

Even while walking to and fro you keep mumbling to yourself.

You have to add reminders and stick post-it notes to remind your to-dos for the day or for the week.

You maintain a checklist and strike off the task that have been accomplished at EOD (personal/professional)

You refer to people who are a year or two younger than you as kids.

You fervently pray and expect that all your plausible and implausible wishes come true, becoz you’re running short of time.

You decide to stay hungry than to irate your tummy with spicy food

You wear a grumpy expression on New Year’s Eve, since you know the next working day is going to be as hectic as any other day. Why pretend to be happy?

Saving Spree

How would you curb your expenses and save yourself from a financial pitfall?
Pretend to forget your Debit/Credit card at home.
Carry minimum amount of cash in your purse/wallet.
Minimize eating outside.
Make a budget for every month and stick to it no matter what.
Set savings goals on a weekly basis.Eliminate excessive coffee drinks/or cut down on unhealthy beverages.
Quit smoking and boozing.
Cut down on apparel/footwear/jewelry shopping (need not run to a mall every time there’s a sale).
Cut down on buying expensive books. Instead take a lifetime membership in a library.
Set an alarm and let it buzz every 15mins when you are out for shopping.
Who cares, I need not cut down on my expenses! After all “Money alone sets the entire world in motion.”


The options in this poll indicate things I haven't been able to follow yet.

Soul mate- Myth or Reality

Have you ever wondered whether the soul mate you are looking for really exists or it is just a figment of your imagination?

Well, even I don’t have the answer to this question.

People yearn to meet the one all through their lives. Some do meet the one and some don’t.

Wiki defines a “soul mate is a term used to designate someone with whom one has a feeling of deep and natural affinity, love, intimacy, sexuality, spirituality, and compatibility.”

For ages we have been hearing about soul mate and how we wish to meet the one. But did we ever ponder upon why the word soul mate is so called?

According to a Greek philosopher, Plato, humans originally consisted of four arms, four legs, and a single head made of two faces. However, Zeus (Greek God of thunder and sky) feared their power and split them into halves, condemning them to spend their lives searching for the other half to complete them. (Source reference: Wikipedia)From then on people have been searching for their soul mate.

What is my take on this subject? Well, I used to believe this too. But by and by my notion about this whole soul mate thing changed. No, don’t get me wrong, am not discounting the concept. It is just that at present people get to interact with so many people that even if their soul mate would be right under their nose they wouldn’t be able to recognize him/her.

This reminds me of this movie Dil Toh Pagal Hai, where Madhuri was a staunch supporter of this whole soul mate thingy. And she did find hers in King Khan in the movie. In the same way this movie Serendipity (one of my favourites) is based on the same concept. Nevertheless, how many of us can claim that the person we share are life with or are intending to share are life with is our true soul mate. I bet we can’t!

We expect that there is one person who will love us just the way we are. This person would complete our life with qualities that are missing in us. Instead of looking for Mr or Miss Right why can’t we just find the happiness within ourselves? Why build false hopes that the next person will add meaning to our life. Why can’t we make it meaningful and worthwhile ourselves?

Deep down I feel that because of this over-hyped concept of soul mate we build are expectations way too high. We expect so much from our other or better half that this over-expectation leads us to misery, hopelessness, unhappiness, and discontent. People fall in love and when their expectations are not met they fall for someone else, assuming that may be he or she wasn’t my soul mate after all! And then this never ending hunt for Mr or Miss Right continues. Why can’t we become soul mate of our partners, working through the challenges of our lives, rather than looking for a soul mate? We can build mutual trust, love, and respect for our better halves and make a relationship perfect rather than looking for a perfect person to set our lives right.



P.S: A couple of days ago, I read somewhere that human being is polygamous by nature. Wonder if this is true, how many soul mates do we have to look for?